I used to think adults were simply better at things.
Not everything, but enough that they no longer had to stand somewhere looking completely lost while someone explained the absolute basics.
Then I became one.
It turns out adults aren’t necessarily better at everything. We’ve just become very good at avoiding situations where we might have to admit we don’t know what we’re doing.
When was the last time you started something completely new? Not something that built on skills you already had, but something where you expected to be a beginner from the moment you started. Something where there was a good chance you’d get it wrong more often than you’d get it right.
For a lot of people, it’s probably been quite a while.
Children don’t seem to think twice about it. They fall off bikes, miss footballs, draw cats that somehow end up looking like potatoes, and then carry on as if none of it really matters. Being bad at something is simply part of learning.
Somewhere along the way, that changes. As adults, we become much more aware of how we look, and being a beginner starts to feel uncomfortable instead of exciting. We quietly stick to the things we’re already reasonably good at, not because we don’t want to learn, but because starting from scratch feels surprisingly difficult.
Looking back, I think that’s a shame. Some of the best experiences begin with having absolutely no idea what you’re doing.
Adults Want Progress Without Looking Inexperienced
I don’t think adults are afraid of learning something new. Most of us quite like the idea of having a new skill.
What we’re less enthusiastic about is everything that comes before it. The awkward first attempts, the obvious mistakes, and that slightly uncomfortable feeling of not really knowing what we’re doing while everyone else seems to have figured it out.
The problem is that those moments aren’t optional. They’re part of learning anything. Whether it’s surfing, playing an instrument, taking photographs, or speaking another language, everyone starts in exactly the same place.
It’s just that we rarely see that part. We notice the surfer gliding across a wave, the musician playing effortlessly, or the photographer capturing the perfect shot. What we don’t see are all the missed waves, wrong notes, blurry photos, and frustrating attempts that came first.
I think that’s why starting something new can feel more intimidating than it really is. We compare our first attempt with someone else’s hundredth and wonder why it doesn’t look the same.
In reality, a messy beginning usually doesn’t mean you’re doing anything wrong. More often than not, it simply means you’ve started.
Being Bad at Something Is Not the Same as Failing
I think we often mix up being a beginner with failing.
They’re not the same thing.
When you’re new to something, you’re supposed to get things wrong. That’s simply how learning works. The difficult part is that, as adults, we don’t always give ourselves permission to be new at something.
It’s a bit like deciding to learn Spanish and feeling disappointed because you still need a few seconds to remember how to order a coffee. Nobody expects to become fluent after a handful of lessons, yet somehow we expect ourselves to be good at other new skills almost immediately.
I think part of the problem is who we compare ourselves to. We see people who have been surfing for years, speaking another language with ease, or doing something that now looks effortless. We rarely see what those first few weeks or months looked like.
Looking back, I don’t think being bad at something says very much at all. Most of the time, it simply means you’ve only just started, and everyone who eventually becomes good at something has been in exactly the same position.
Learning to Surf as an Adult Feels Particularly Strange
Learning to surf as an adult is probably one of the best examples of this.
From the beach, it all looks surprisingly straightforward. Someone paddles for a wave, pops to their feet, and rides it towards the shore. It seems simple enough until you’re the one lying on the board.
Then you realise how much is happening all at once. The board is moving, the water is moving, the wave is changing every second, and you’re trying to remember everything your instructor explained a few moments earlier.
During your first lesson, you’ll probably miss waves completely, stand up too early or too late, and spend plenty of time in the water instead of on the board. If you do manage to stand up, there’s every chance you’ll be back in the sea a second later. That’s simply part of learning, and everyone around you has gone through exactly the same stage.
The nice thing is that progress often arrives quietly. One day you catch a wave you would have missed before. The next, you stand for a little longer than you did yesterday. None of it feels dramatic at the time, but those small moments gradually add up until you realise you’re doing things that felt impossible when you first arrived.
If you’re curious about what those first few sessions are actually like, have a look at our guide to what you can expect during your first week learning to surf.
Nobody Is Watching You as Much as You Think
Before we try something new, it’s easy to imagine that everyone else will notice every mistake we make.
Surfing feels like a good example of this. You fall off your board and it can feel as though the whole beach must have seen it. The reality is usually much less dramatic. Most people in the water are concentrating on catching their next wave, trying to remember what their instructor said, or simply catching their breath after the last paddle.
That’s something we noticed when writing about why talking to strangers can feel so uncomfortable. We often assume everyone is paying attention to us, when in reality they’re usually thinking about themselves just as much.
A beginner surf lesson makes that clear quite quickly. Everyone misses waves, everyone has moments where they aren’t quite sure what they’re doing, and everyone spends more time in the water than they expected. It’s all part of learning, and nobody expects a group of first-time surfers to look like experts.
Once you realise that, it’s much easier to relax and enjoy the experience. Instead of worrying about how you look, you start paying attention to the ocean, listening to your instructor, and celebrating the small moments that make each session a little better than the last.
The Joy Comes Before the Skill
One thing I’ve always noticed is how differently children and adults react to learning something new.
A child stands up on a surfboard for the first time, rides a wave for a couple of seconds, and can’t wait to tell everyone about it. The ride might not have been smooth, but that hardly seems to matter. They’re excited because they managed something they couldn’t do a few minutes earlier.
Adults often see the same moment differently. We catch our first wave and immediately start pointing out everything that wasn’t quite right. It wasn’t very long, we lost our balance, or we fell off before reaching the beach. Instead of noticing what went well, we focus on what still needs improving.
The funny thing is that those first few seconds are often the moments people remember most. Nobody expects a beginner’s first wave to look perfect, and it doesn’t need to. The excitement comes from realising that something which seemed impossible at the start of the lesson has suddenly become possible.
Looking back, I think that’s one of the nicest parts of learning to surf. Progress doesn’t usually arrive in big, dramatic leaps. It comes in lots of small moments that slowly build your confidence until one day you realise just how far you’ve come.
Surfing Reminds You How to Play
One thing I’ve noticed is that adults don’t play as much as they used to.
We exercise, train, and set goals for ourselves. We track our steps, measure our sleep, and somehow even our hobbies can start to feel like something we’re supposed to get better at. It’s easy to slip into the habit of treating every activity as another way to be more productive.
Of course, there’s plenty to learn. Technique matters, fitness helps, and understanding the ocean is something that develops over time. But during your first few sessions, none of that feels like the most important part.
Instead, you’re focused on something much simpler. You paddle for a wave, fall off, laugh about it, and paddle back out to try again. For a little while, you’re not thinking about work, emails, or everything waiting for you back home. You’re completely occupied by the next wave in front of you.
Looking back, I think that’s one of the reasons so many people enjoy learning to surf. It’s one of the few activities where being a complete beginner is still genuinely fun. You don’t have to be good at it to enjoy it, and for a couple of hours, that turns out to be more than enough.
Growth Usually Starts With Not Knowing
Modern adulthood tends to reward competence. We like to know what we’re doing, have a plan, and feel prepared before we begin. There’s nothing wrong with that, but it also means we can end up sticking to the things we already know we’re good at.
Trying something completely new feels different. Whether it’s travelling on your own for the first time, joining a group where you don’t know anyone, or taking your first surf lesson, there’s always a bit of uncertainty at the beginning. You don’t know exactly how it’s going to go, and that’s part of the experience.
I remember feeling the same before my first solo surf trip. It wasn’t memorable because everything went perfectly. If anything, there were plenty of moments where I had no idea what I was doing. Looking back, that’s exactly what made the experience so rewarding. It was something completely new, and I learned far more from giving it a go than I would have by waiting until I felt ready.
I think surfing has a way of reminding you that it’s okay not to have everything figured out before you begin. Nobody arrives at their first lesson knowing exactly what they’re doing, and nobody expects them to. You simply start where you are, enjoy the process, and let the experience unfold from there.
If you’ve ever found yourself waiting until you feel completely ready, you might enjoy reading our article on why sometimes the hardest part is simply taking the first step.
Your Confidence Will Probably Arrive Afterwards
One of the things we hear quite often is, “I’d love to try surfing, but I’m just not confident enough.”
I understand the feeling, but confidence rarely comes before you begin. Most people don’t arrive at their first surf lesson feeling completely relaxed. They’re wondering whether they’ll be able to stand up, whether they’ll look out of place, or whether everyone else will pick it up more quickly.
Then the lesson begins, and those thoughts gradually start to disappear. You’re too busy paddling for waves, listening to your instructor, laughing after a wipeout, and trying again. Before long, you’re focusing on what you’re doing rather than worrying about how you look.
The interesting part is that confidence usually arrives without you noticing. You catch your first wave, then another. You remember something your instructor told you the day before, or you realise you’re feeling much more comfortable in the water than you did when you arrived.
Looking back, I don’t think confidence is something you need before trying surfing. For most beginners, it’s simply something that grows naturally as they spend more time in the ocean and discover they’re capable of much more than they expected.
A Beginner Surf Camp Makes Starting Easier
One of the reasons learning at a beginner surf camp feels so different from learning on your own is that everyone arrives at a similar starting point.
Some guests have never surfed before. Others are travelling alone for the first time, sharing a room with people they’ve only just met, or simply doing something completely outside their comfort zone after years of routine. Everyone is new to something, even if it isn’t surfing itself.
That’s what creates such a relaxed atmosphere. At Kyuka, the instructors guide you through each step, from choosing the right equipment to finding the best conditions for your level. Around you, everyone else is learning too. Someone catches their first wave, someone else wipes out, and another person is still trying to work out which way to carry their board back up the beach. None of it feels unusual because everyone is figuring things out together.
Looking back, I think that’s one of the nicest parts of learning in a group. You celebrate each other’s small victories, laugh about the inevitable mistakes, and realise very quickly that nobody expects you to know what you’re doing on day one. By the end of the week, those shared experiences often become just as memorable as the surfing itself.
If you’re wondering what those first few days are really like, our guide to whether Fuerteventura is a good destination for beginner surfers explains what you can expect from your first surf holiday.
You Don’t Need to Be Good at Something to Enjoy It
I think this is something adults forget surprisingly often.
Enjoying something doesn’t have to depend on being good at it.
When you’re a beginner, every small success feels exciting. You stand up for a couple of seconds, catch a wave you missed yesterday, or simply paddle a little more confidently than you did before. None of those moments are particularly impressive to anyone watching, but they matter because they’re new to you.
Somewhere along the way, it’s easy to start believing that every hobby should have a purpose beyond simply enjoying it. We exercise to get fitter, learn skills for work, and often measure our progress by how quickly we’re improving.
Surfing has a way of cutting through that. During your first few sessions, you’re not thinking about becoming a great surfer. You’re trying to catch your next wave, laughing when things don’t quite go to plan, and enjoying being out in the ocean. Somehow, that’s enough.
Looking back, I think that’s one of the nicest parts of learning something new. You don’t have to be good at it to enjoy it. In fact, those first few sessions, when everything still feels unfamiliar and every small improvement feels like a win, are often the moments people remember most.
A Small Kyuka Reminder
If you’ve been thinking about learning to surf in Fuerteventura but keep waiting until you feel completely ready, you’re probably not alone. Almost everyone arrives with a few doubts, whether it’s about standing up on the board, keeping up with the rest of the group, or simply trying something they’ve never done before.
The interesting thing is that those worries usually don’t last very long. Once you’re in the water, listening to your instructor, paddling for your first waves, and sharing a few laughs after the inevitable wipeouts, you stop thinking so much about whether you’re ready. You simply get caught up in the experience.
That’s what we see every week at Kyuka. Nobody arrives knowing exactly what they’re doing, and nobody is expected to. People progress at their own pace, celebrate the small victories, and often surprise themselves with what they manage by the end of the week.
Looking back, I don’t think anyone remembers their first surf holiday because they became an amazing surfer overnight. They remember the excitement of catching that first wave, the people they met, and the feeling of trying something that had been sitting on their bucket list for far too long.
Sometimes that’s all a beginner really needs. Not the confidence to know exactly how it’s going to go, but simply the curiosity to find out.
